Two baby seals walk into a club.

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why couldnt the jew play basketball? He was handicapp

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? "Get in the car Robin."

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How do you kill a Jewish person? Like any other person, they are like any other person of any race and religion.

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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What's worse than the WNBA? The Cleveland Cavaliers.

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What did the aborted fetus say to the recycling bin? Nothing because it isn't capable of speaking, and it was in the dumpster

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What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

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Why isn't the dog a rebublican? Because it's a dog.

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why did the kid sit alone at lunch? he had no friends

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a man walks into a bad part of town he is shot 13 times and dies.

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What did the farmer say when he found his tractor? "There's my tractor."

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Excuse me waiter! What the hell is this fly doing on my soup? I believe it's swimming on it, sir.

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What is a hammer? It's not a screwdriver

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How did bill lose his legs he got them amputated after contracting a severe case of "INeedToGetMyLegsAmputatedSyndrome"

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Roses are red Violets are purple, and anyone who tells you otherwise is wrong.

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What's worse than finding The Holocaust in your apple? Most things, because that's impossible.

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Here comes the bride, all dressed in white. Here comes the groom, carrying a broom, because somebody spilled something on the floor.

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Why did the guy eat pizza? Because he likes pizza.

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Santa and smart blond jump off a building who lands frost none nethither exist

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Why did Schrödinger's Cat cross the road? It didn't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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