How do you kill a dumb blonde? Stab them in the chest 43 times.

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What do you do to vegetables to make them taste good? Nothing. They are still people, and they can't speak up for themselves.

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What would you call a two-foot Irishman named Max? Max.

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If a chicken and a half lays an egg and half in a half of a day how long does it take a monkey with a peg leg to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle?

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What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

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If John has 10 packs of beer and he drinks 8 packs,what is John left with? Morbid Obesity.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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what did the boy with cancer get for christmas? i dont know he's jewish

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Roses are red Violets are blue I love you a lot But you're dead and I have unhealthy necrophiliac tendencies

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How do you catch a predator? You throw a beartrap at a child.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew?

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

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Dislike if you are a prostitute

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How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

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Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

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A black man in a hooded sweatshirt is sprinting down a back alley. He is trying to get into better shape by exercising and knows a shortcut to his house.

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Jerry Sandusky walks into an Under 21

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon.

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Aids, Black People, Cancer, Death, Retarded, Drunk, Sex, Black People, Holocaust, Blackies, White People, BLACK

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Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? A: The wheel chair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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