Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homosexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual pandas just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homosexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

News of the day - David gives back 2 pounds to someone. The police, as he stole from a old nana to pay for a toothbrush

what do u call a Muslim flying a plane??? 9-11

What would Helen Keller say to Obama? Wow Im really impressed that you are our nation's first black president. You're doing a great job. Except it would come out like DUUUUURNNNNNAFMKAAAALLLL

Can yas all stfu SBBBBBBBBBSBSBSBSBSSBBSBSSBSBSBSBSBSBSBSBSBSBBBBBB

Did you hear the one about the Mexican that went to college? All his life, Juan wanted to get a decent education, but was unable to due to his family's low income. So Juan worked hard all his life, and got a part-time job. He made a little cash here, a little there. He also studied vigorously, getting a 33 on his ACT. All that work eventually paid off, and Juan was eventually accepted at Princeton University. Juan is now a highly paid Neurological surgeon, and has saved countless lives

Why couldn't Jack and Jill climb the hill? Because they were bagels.

There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe, When he woke up one night he discovered with fright, That the friendly old neighbor from next door had broken into his house with a chain saw in an alcohol-induced murder attempt.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cot Death.

Q:why did the man jump of the house A:he did not I threw a frige at him

What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

The duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man who was running the stand, hey I cancer CC

What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

So I picked my nose while peeing, and it fell in the toilet so I didn't have to wipe it on anything. This is more of a story I wanted to share than a joke

Rose: Mom, why was I named Rose? Mom: Because when you were born a rose petal landed on your head. Rose: Than why is my brother named Brick? Mom: I liked the name.

Why was the asian bad at sex? Because he was 5 years old

A.M.E.V.A.A A-ny M-essage E-xpressed V-ia A-cronym is A-wesome

how do you save a black man ... u don't

Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

A black man, Jew and a Mexican go camping. A bear wanders into their campsite, but upon seeing them runs away because it's afraid of humans.

Why did so many describe Billy as glued to the t.v.? A terrible case of bullying and superglue resulted in the inability of Billy to remove himself from his own t.v., causing immense feelings of revenge, but his inability to move left these feelings unfulfilled.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because KFC was hiring

a horse walks into a bar. Noticing the potentially dangerous situation everyone leaves, the bartender calls RSPCA who come and retrieve the horse and order is restored.

Which deranged adventurer thinks that (one`s unprotected cranium) is stronger than (a brick structure) Mario. he keeps bashing his head on blocks in attempts to prove his own worth

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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