A heavily drunk man walks into a bar and proceeds to die of alcohol poisoning.

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Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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Why did Johnathan drop his popsicle? He was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Johnathan

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So these two guys walk into a bar... Well, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother a whore.

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Whats worse than suicide? death

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What did the disabled kid get for his birthday. The same as any other kid.

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Why did the school fall? Because a hurricane hit.

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Q: How many licks does it take to the center of a tootsie pop? A: At least one.

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What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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who likes gay porn and has dirty littlesweeneys thathesticks up his hole? Jahn Willems

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Good job, son.

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Intercom:ALERT! THERES AND EXTREIMEST IS THE SCHOOL! Little kid: Sir, can I borrow that towel on your head? BOOOOOOM!

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into another apple and finding the other half

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally murdered 6's entire family.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was clumsy.

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What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

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why did the chicken cross the road? he was an escaped mental paitent

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What's worse than being short? Being a Tutsi in 1994.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a microwave? If you don't know the difference you need a psychiatrist.

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Yo mama so fat she runs the risk of stroke, heart disease, or diabetes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the sidewalk he was on does not.

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What did the Japanese kid get for his birthday? Nothing, his gifts were washed away.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead become stranded on a desert island. As they are searching for food and shelter, they come across a mystical-looking lamp. They rub the lamp, but nothing happens because genies don't exist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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