Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face.

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what has balls and is long and suckible? Spaghetti

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What's your favorite Sylvia Plath quote? "Turn on the oven."

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What did the black guy say to the slave driver. Nothing, slavery no longer exists.

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What worse than stubbing your toe? Getting raped by a panda.

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Q:What has more brains than the baby you just shot? A:The wall behind it!!!

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Whats fuzzy and pink? A pink fuzz ball

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Why did the patient die of aids disorder? Butt sex. Lots and lots of butt sex.

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shirt and blue, i call this one snow white, to score and seven years a jo, six samurai kageki, coral, 50 piece, specific frame, whats with that one, amy, hoption, smell my butt, smell my balls, smell my fart, smell my poop, urgay, pringles,

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What's faster than a Nascar Racecar? My thoughts. -Juanita

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Man goes to the doctors, He waits patiently in the waiting room for nine minutes and is then called in to see the doctor for a routine check up. After seeing the doctor he picks up his sisters kid from school and carries on with his day.

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Why should you never attempt to rob Chuck Norris? Because he will beat you up as he knows self defense.

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Q how do you feel? A with a series of nerve endings, that send signals to my brain

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What do you say to seduce a woman? Is that a mustache? WTF!

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I woke up this morning and ran five miles. I am proud of myself for engaging in such a healthy lifestyle.

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What do a black man and a dog have in common? They're both going to die some day.

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Columbus Day... A day to remember the anniversary of Columbus enslaving America.

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A 14 year old boy's mother walks into his room whilst he is naked. The boy requests for his mother to leave; so she apologizes and leaves as the whole incident was rather embarrasing.

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Why was Reed sad? His mother has a penis

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What do you call a growing family of micro-organisms? Cancer

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Which is worse, 9/11 or the holocaust? Biting into an apple and finding a worm.

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Q: Whats the difference between a table and a Mexican? A: You tell me.

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How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops