Why did the man drink a glass of water? Why not?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are wilting violets are wilting YOU HAD ONE JOB

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Knock knock Who's there? To To be continued.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A black man, a mexican man, and a caucasian man, walk into a bar with handguns. The three break out into a gun fight and everyone is killed in the cross-fire

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Want to know how the dyslexic man with no left arm and no left leg? All left

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Have you heard that Bert & Ernie from Sesame Street are gay? If so, than whoever told you may be mentally challenged, Bert & Ernie are both puppets which even though they resemble people with active personalities, they remain puppets and do not have a sexual oreintation.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

There are two kinds of people in the world: Those who can count and those who can't.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

the person above me ^ lost his virginity to a howler monkey and the person below me was his gay friend untill he found out about his recent run in with a howler monkey and does not wish the same fait as he does.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree? No

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did Lucy fall off the swing? She had no arms and legs Knock knock Who's there? Not Lucy

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Jack be nimble, Jack be quick... Jack didn't make it over the candle stick and died.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's love like? Some people say it's like a lotus flower, others say it's like an orchid... Personally I'd like to say it's like a fire at the bottom of you're soul-- like when people sin and go to hell... that fire burns forever???

thumb_up thumb_down -19

so 3 guys are a plane George W. Bush, a mexican, and a chinese man. the plane is going down because of too much weight they haave to throw things out. The mexcan throws out a suitcase full of tacos and says "we have enough of this in out country" Then the chinese throws out a suitcase full of rice and says "we have enough of this in out country" Then George W. Bush pushes the mexican out and says "we have to enough of these in out country."

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

The moment where Perfect Cell returns declaring he has become "even more perfect" There is no level above perfect :P But sure Cell, strive to improve further on your "perfection", oh he is dead nevermind. Still my favorite character, narcissist, with a touch of class, and a sadistic personality, what more can you wish for?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock, knock! Who's there? Mary Mary who? Mary Smith.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What was the last thing that went through the crashing helicopter pilot's head? The propeller.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

i think dylan is turnimg gay for amy

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted tobe cool, But I look like you

thumb_up thumb_down -19

yo momma so fat, it appears she has two chins

thumb_up thumb_down -19

In a joke book: So a man walks into a bar. Suddenlly the universe around the author crack. Unable to sustain the infinite potential of punchlines, the author tumbles through an empty void amongst shards of his broken reality.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why is Harry Potter fake Because its a movie

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Bride: "He went to Jared's!!! Ex: "But every Kiss Begins with Kay...."

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops