Why was the ghast from minecraft crying? His family died

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how many dead babies can you fit into a bath tub i dont know i didnt get the chance to fill it up yet

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You look like Susan Boyle f**ked Snooki and then got hit by a truck.

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One time I said to my friend, "There are too many black people in this country." I forgot he was black.

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did you hear about the dyslexic, overweight, wheelchair bound blind guy? No? Niether did I, I'm deaf so don't hear about anything.

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Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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what do you call the quadriplegic man who went water skiing? Skip

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why do ducks have webbed feet? to stomp out fires. why do elephants have flat feet? to stomp out the burining ducks.

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Jehovah's Witness. Have you heard the word of God?

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How do you give a cold sore to catnip? Because he needed lemon juice

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

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Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

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why did the Mexican eat a octopus because he was hungry would die if he didn't

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As he stood in her front yard with a boombox in the pouring rain, she leaned her head out the window with a smile and he was electrocuted.

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Q. Whats brown and sticky? A. Poo

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What happened when the Arabic man went through airport security? He was racially profiled and stopped, delaying not only him but the line of people behind him.

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4 score and 7 years ago was 1965

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2 penguins in a tub. one looks to the other an says, "pass the bar of soap." the other looks at him.."what do you think i am, a typewriter?"

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Why is Coldplay really big in Japan? They're tall guys.

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How do you take a picture of a man with a wooden leg? You can't take pictures with wooden legs.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops