Why did the clown's ballon animal pop? He was a victim in a drive by shooting.

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Q:What do you call a mexican witha clean record? A: Impossible

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have ADD ...

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A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: A ladie not working in the kitchen A: WTF dude thats just terrible

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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Red my dear, we are no exceptions.

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Why did the chair break? The person that sat in it was over weight

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Two men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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I am pleased and honored to hear you speak that beautifully straight from your heart Nero, you are without equal, unmatched. And he who is unmatched, also stands alone.

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Obama stumbles upon a KKK meeting. All the klansmen shake his hand and respect him because he is the President.

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Why did little Timmy scrape his knee? He was launched off of an aircraft carrier.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

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Why did the kid jump? He didn't.

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What's is the worst thing america has done? Jersey Shore, We mad those idiots rich.

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Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

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why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

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Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

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A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

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How do you keep children off your lawn? Touch them.

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Why couldn't the horse open the door? - Because it was locked...Beeeeeeeeeeeeeef Jelly

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, walls are inanimate things therefore it cannot talk.

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What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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Your mom's so fat... she probably needs to go on some sort of diet to avoid a serious heart condition and inevetible death

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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