What should you never give to your friends as a wedding present? An old plastic bag full of rubbish.

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What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

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What is the biggest lie in the world? I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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How do you get 100 Jews into a car? You can't. It's physically impossible.

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How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

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What is funnier than 24 69

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What did Sammy get for Christmas? Raped.

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Q: Do you know what you can make when you have enough cents? A: Dollars

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woman's rights

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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knock, , knock , who's there the gas man the gas man who ? the gas man who is gonna turn your gas off !

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Q: You and a thousand other people are suddenly bursting in flames at a park, there is a big barrel of water just a few steps away from you, what do you do in order to save the people that truly matter? A: Stop drop and roll, duh!

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jess always squints her eyes when making a point

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he found out the oreo he slept with last night had aids and he wanted to make sure he didnt get the deadly disease so he went to the doctor to get tested.

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Why is josh such a retard Because when he was born a brick fell on his head.

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Why did the war end? Because one country surrendered. They were getting beat pretty bad, it seemed like the only viable option.

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What did the Chinese man say to the black man? I'm Part of my Asian herritage.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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What's read,bubbly and looks out the window? A baby in a microwave

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What did the white boy say to the black boy? You're black

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Q. Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? A. Because he had alzheimer's and couldn't remember how to ride a bike.

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what did the astronomer say when he lost his telescope? where is my telescope?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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