what has a hard shaft and an even harder head? A hammer

Q. What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a trampoline? A. I don't were cleats when I jump on my trampoline.

what's black and hangs from a tree in my garden? a blackberry

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

The boy gets shot in the face, he then dies of childhood obesity.

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen cheese

Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

Q: Why did the boy have blue balls? A: because the respectable girl with high self esteem refused to give him head.

Q: Whats metal and shiny? A: You're lame childhood accomplishments.

One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

why did victor have a tube on his neck he was helping james with security

Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

What's the difference between a pizza and a black man? It would be cannibalism to eat a black man.

Did you hear the one about the dead guy? Apparently he was no longer living.

How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

Roses are nice, violets are fine, ill be the 6, if you be the 9!

What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

What did the aborted fetus say to the recycling bin? Nothing because it isn't capable of speaking, and it was in the dumpster

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How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb? Obviously more than six because my bass meant is still dark.

Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

How did the black man start his car? He turned on the emission and lightly leaned his foot on either the accelerator or reverse pedal, depending on the position of the car.

Why was Susie's mom crying? Because Susie got hit by a bus

Q: What did the black man do at KFC? A: nothing, he ate dinner at home.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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