a kid says, "where are you from?" other kid says "my mom"

How do you stop a lumberjack? You thrust a javelin through his lungs

your momma so fat.... that as she walked by....... i missed 3 commercials

Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

Whites black white and red all over? The nazi flag.

"What starts with an 'F' and ends with 'uck'?" "I don't know, what?" "'Firetruck.'"

Why did the man have no head? It was blown off in Iraq 2 and days ago

What's the worst part about rollerblading? Telling your dad that you're gay.

My girlfriend told me I couldn't satisfy her sexually. I told her she was beautiful and gave her flowers.

why did hellen kellers dog run away? because if your name was awughunguh you'd run too.

What do you call a black person flying an airplane? The pilot.

A guy is taking a pee in the ocean and a fish swims up and drinks the pee. The fish says "thanks for the lemonade."

Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane act

A Mexican, a Jew, and a Colored guy walk into a bar, the bartender looks up and says: "What can I get you gentlemen today?"

How do you kill a baby? You don't muder is a sin and against the law

Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

whats black, then white, then dead all over? Michael jackson

Friends are just like trees. They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

Roses are brown Violets are brown What the hell who keeps shitting in my garden

roses are red... violets are blue ..... Cancer

Why was Reed sad? His mother has a penis

Why did the girl cry? She got hit by a bus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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