What does a penguins wear on it's feet? Nothing penguins are incapable of wearing foot wear, also they do not have feet they are called 'flippers'.

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How many pancakes does it take to lift up a dog house? Silly goose, alligators can't fly!

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What's fat and ugly? Your face ... But only if its fat and ugly

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welcome to anti joke.com. you were expecting an anti joke wernt you.

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why couldnt the jew play basketball? He was handicapp

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Eeny meeny miny mo, Catch a tiger by it's toe, If he hollers let him go, Because if you don't he would attack you and go straight for you're neck and you would die a painful death...

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Why is moral man a great Cerebrity? you would not get it, its too cerebral... Moral: I SAID LEAVE HIM ALONE PLEAAAAAAAAAASE! BUAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!

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yo Dawg I heard you like dogs... So I sent yo ass to prison and got an NFL contract

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this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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xCh3wyy is the biggest fail in the entire universe. If you head to www.youtube.com/xxch3wyyxx You will see how much he fails. Please dislike his horrible video and tell him to suck a prick.

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whats long, fat, and people love it in their mouth? blunts.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but his stomach was not big enough to finish. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free meal.

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I like my women like I like my coffee... In a cup.

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This guy gets on a plane and leaves he takes a bite of a green Apple and says to sower then he takes a bite out of a red Apple and says to sweet so he takes a bite of a gernade and says to crunchy so the plane lands and he walks past a little boy crying and says little boy why are you crying because a green Apple came down and hit my dog in the head so he's walking along and sees a nether boy crying and says little boy why are you crying cause a red Apple came down and hit me on the head so he's walking along abd sees a little girl laughing little girl he says why are you laughing cause I farted and the building be hind me bluw up lol ????

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Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped.

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"is it just me or is it getting really hot in here?" "the house is on fire and we are locked in"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had very recentley made his escape from a nearby farm, of which was owned by a man close to dying of a Rhabdoid Tumor. His family was in mourn.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen and warns him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and otherwise damaging consequences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

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What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

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What's grey and can't fly? A parking lot.

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Yo momma is so fat that she is in the guinness records

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i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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