In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

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Q. What do you call a Widow's Husband? A. Dead...

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Why does the girl continue to cry repetently everyday? Because she found out she was diagnosed with terminal cancer.

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whats worse then being a jew now? being a jew in 1942

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Knock knock Who's there? *silence* WHO'S THERE? *silence* -Looks out window- Slenderman

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what did the judge say to the lawyer during a trial. He said We are all in a court. thus concluding that the judge was retarted.

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Why did the Jewish population diminish in the '40s? Showers and Ovens

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What's black and white and in the desert? Tourists being held hostage by a tribe.

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Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

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whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

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Why was the black person playing hockey? Because he found an interest to the sport during his childhood years.

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Mum did you make my milkshake? No, I didn't son, but your father did. Fther's dead. I know.

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Why did the prostitute begin to cry when she saw the chinese patron's penis? His testicles are diced onions.

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Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

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If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

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When the sun goes down... Most of the guys pants goes down too. Just be straight XD

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OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

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whats worse than getting bit by a tick. getting bit by a deer tick that as lyme disease.

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Why did the bakery run out of the business? They weren't making enough dough

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Nice ass. Too bad it's cracked in the middle, though.

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What do you call a black man with no legs? A fine example of the consequences of drink driving. Make sure you are physically stable or not under the effects of depressants, drugs or any form of alcohol before deciding to use a motor vehicle.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

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What do you call a half man half manatee? A manatee

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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