Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar Was it you? No

What did the robet say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. Its funny cuase the robot had no arms.

Knock Knock! F*ck off

If a tree falls in the forest, does anyone hear it? no, but it was home to several endangered species that are now extinct

Why did the man Jump of a bridge? Because he got sick of his life and he wanted to die.

What did the cancer patient say before they died? I am in so much pain. I love you all

What was the blind man's favorite game? Marco Polo

Why did the boy let the falling brick hit him in the head? He had no legs, so he could not move

Why did Logan lose his lunch? Because he forgot to his lunchbox on the day-trip.

why did the monkey fall out of a tree?? a snail threw a refridgerator at him

what did the older brother do? put on a joke on anti jokes what did the younger brother do ? give it a minus score what did the older brother do ? tell him and then played gears of war 2 (they got gears 3 but wanted to go bakc in time, not like michael J fox in a car with a crazy doctor but as in play an old game)

What has eyes but can't see? Helen Keller. What has ears but can't hear? A field of corn.

What did the aliens say when they first landed on planet Earth? We've come back for Anthony Davis.

What did the father say to his child Christmas morning? you're adopted

what is the best invention ever created ? ............ PORN !!!!

What happened to the child who's mother drank and took drugs while she was pregnant? Dead.

sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

Q: What did the Rabbi say to the butcher? A: "Do you have the time?"

A rooster lays an egg on the tip of a roof. Which side does it fall to? Roosters don't lay eggs

A Buddhist priest, and mexican drug lord, and a 12 year old girl walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the little girl and says. "Honey, you're too young to be in here." the little girl looks around and says. "Oh, My mistake." and leaves.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sunflowers are yellow, Daises are white.

There was a chicken. It squarked.

Knock Knock Who's there? Ben, you just called me. Aren't we supposed to go jogging. Oh yea, I lost track of time. Is it cold out? Yea it is. You should bring a jacket. Alright, can you get me a water? Yea, no problem. Thankyou.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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