Ask me if i'm a tree. Q: Are you a tree? A: No.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why couldn't Jack and Jill climb the hill? Because they were bagels.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Pilot: We need to lighten the load of this plane Italian: I'll throw out these pizzas, there are too many of them in my country Mexican: I will throw out these tacos, there are just too many of them in my country The american stares in horror at the two men, the pizza and tacos were their only food and they were lost in the Himalayas.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? - Nothing This homeless man got a gift for his Birthday. What happened to the gift? - It got stolen the following day What did this homeless man get for New Year? - Still nothing Get real.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

asking someone to check ur broken wing mirror to fall into that persons arms by accident is not a good idea

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's worse than falling out of a tree and landing on a dog? Rape.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did sally fall of of the swing she had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead." It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is black and hangs on a rope next to a rebel flag in my back yard? A tire swing for my redneck kids to swing on.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Your Mom The End.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q. What is the answer to life the universe and everything A. 42

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's worst then finding a worm in your apple Eating it.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why is the world going to end on 9 December 2014? I don't know why, but IT IS

thumb_up thumb_down -9

whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? babies aren't fruit.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

roses are red violets are blue kyle brown and pj nosaki have big balls

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did Harry Potter say when he lost his wand? Where's my wand?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

y does byonce sing to the left? because black people have no rights

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock knock. After 1 and a half minutes of waiting, Phil assumes his friend is not home, and promptly leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

SUCK MY 29 AND A HALF FOOT LONG DICK BITCH JUST KIDDING............ IT IS 69 FEET LONG GIGADY

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Two kids are playing basketball. One says to the other, "FAILMUFFIN!" The basketball flies out of bounds.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's a boulder's favorite type of music? Boulders don't have ears.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops