How many dead rats can you put in your ex-girlfriend's bed? 437.

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How many Anne Franks does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, cause she's dead.

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what can jump higher than a tree? anything that can jump because everyone knows that trees cannot jump.

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What did Superman say to Batman when they first met? Nothing. They are not real.

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A car with three black people in it is driven off a cliff and everyone dies. Why is this a tragedy? Because it is always a tragedy when human life is lost.

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What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

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Whats big and blue and white and if it falls from a tree its sure to kill you. A fridge with a denim jacket on.

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What's blue and rhymes purple? Get Out

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

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A Jew ran into a wall with a boner. He broke his nose first.

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Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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Why did the boy cry? Because he was a crybaby

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Your mother is so fat, that making fun if her is a terrible thing to do.

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Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Jimmy

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Guy gets new car. TRANFORMER!

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? He was dead.

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What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

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whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

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A drunk man into a bar. He is ripping apart a family

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Q: Why did Robin Williams kill himself? A: Because he was jealous of all the attention that Phillip Seymour Hoffman was getting.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, suck my tip and call me Regi.

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He who laughs last...is not a laughing owl because they're extinct.

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When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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