What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar... However, it's really busy, so they leave and go to a different bar.

Weebles wobble, but paralyzed kids fall down.

Someone just commented on my joke! ... oh wait it was myself

What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

Why did John get hard? He froze to death

Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

Knock knock Whos there? Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior jesus christ?

If a blonde and a brunette fell off a cliff who would reach the ground first? The blonde because she was fatter.

Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

Why did Dan fall of his bicycle? Because somebody threw a refrigerator at him.

why did hitler hate the jews... because the nazies had to pay the gas bill

"Torture the orphans as much as you want. Who they gonna tell? Their parents?"

a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

Why did the pirate get kicked out of the pirate movie? He killed 7 people while looking for treasure under the seats.

Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Someone chucked a fridge at her.

Why did my car stop suddenly? I had arrived at my appropriate destination.

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

Barak Obama, Justin Bieber, and Lindsey Lohan all jump out of a plane. all of their parachutes deploy. except Justin Bieberrs, he then dies of cancer

Hi im a joke i eat turtles

What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

What's the difference between a black guy and a bench? A black guy is a living, breathing human being, and a bench is an inanimate object

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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