What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not to a blind guy.

How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

Once there was a ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end

A kid asks his mom: "Mom, what would I be when I grow up?" And so his mother answers: "You won't grow up, you have cancer"

who has moral fiber? a cerial killer

Knock Knock Who's There? Ted. Oh, Hey Ted.

Whats worse than getting a parking ticket? The Bubonic Plague

I've got some good news an some bad news. The good new is that you just won 10 million dollars! The bad news is I'm just kidding.

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

What is hard, long, moist, and flesh colored? A hotdog you dirty, dirty bastard!

Whats funnier than watching the kid next to you on the computer? Nothing because he is still trying to figure out that i unplugged his mouse!

A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

Who is Dank? A: Billal

What can never be seen by the owner, looks like Jesses mom, and smeels like shit. Jesses dick.

Whats the difference........ Between a duck?

What is the color of your spleen? I dont know i'm not a doctor

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a convicted rapist.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

How do you eat an Elephant? Elephant meat is most palatable after roasting in a 450 degree oven for 2 hours. Garnish with carrots and broccoli.

Why do black guys always have sex on their mind? Because they are men.

whats bad about being black and jewish they have to sit in the back of the oven

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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