Why did the blond check your phone? AIDS

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Why is it stupid to call your son Bethany? It is commonly a girl's name.

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i woke up in the middle of the night and my entire bed was wet... know what i did? i layed a towel down and went back to sleep

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what happened to the little girl when she crossed the line she was shot. shes mexican

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

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little miss muffit sat on her tuffit eating her curds and weigh along came a spider and sat down beside her and said hey whats in the bowl?

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A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

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Hey Johnny what's after 2?? 3.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into another apple and finding the other half

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what's gray, red, and goes over a 100 mph? a toad in a blender

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Jemal picks 3 apples. He eats two of them, and then picks 3 more. What color was Jamal?

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Stacey has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Stacey.

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

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Hey do you have a suitcase? Why? I need one.

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what's worse than stubbing your toe? 9/11

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A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

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Whats funnier than a massacre? Everything.

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What did the mother say to her color blind son when he was about to take his first car ride alone after he got his license? Good luck

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How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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what do u call a guy with 4 nipples? Hairy Styles

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What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

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So a boy walks into a bar. He broke his arm and now is severly crippled

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I woke up in bed with someone this morning. I forget why this is a joke, but your mother is a whore.

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What do a plum and a small bunny have in common? There both purple except for the bunny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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