what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

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What did the young man's clothes smell like after a long night of partying? Laundry detergent, it was quite pleasant

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't a Ferrari in my garage

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His mother was a prostitute.

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What did the famer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?!?!

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Q: What do you call an Ethiopian on a food strike? A: An Ethiopian

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A new pair of shoes

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What's the difference between a statue and a real human? The statue can't run if the birds shit on it.

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A man begged for forgiveness, for a sin commited Jesus forgave him, Jesus loves you

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Q: what do you call a much green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

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A guy walks into a bar, sits down, and gives a heavy sigh. The bartender asks, "What's wrong?" The guy says, "Nothing."

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guess what? i dont know, what? i dont know either, i thought you knew.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am colorblind because Iam a dog.

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What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

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A: Knock Knock B: The door is open please come in.

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Why Did Suzie fall of the swing? She has Polio and will die the Next Day

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Get a life besides thumbing down statements telling you advice.........

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Two men walk into a bar and begin ordering drinks. Both men engage in polite conversation with each other. At the end of the night they each take taxi's home because they realize the potential risk they pose to others if they drive intoxicated.

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My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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"knock knock" "who's there" "Chuck" "Get out of here Chuck I hate you!"

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Why do They call a horse a horse? Because They speak English.

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Why are black people afraid of tigers? Because tigers eat people

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What's the difference between the Hulk and the Thing? One's green.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops