Why is it funny when dogs talk ? Answer: they don't

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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what has wheels and drives? a boat i lied about the wheels

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Against city ordinates, an old woman was keeping chickens in her suburban back yard. One escaped, and there was no where else to go.

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Why were the parents sad? Because their son had a frog stapled to his face and was trying to eat his ice cream on a swing, but he had no arms so he dropped his ice cream into the street and he chased after his ice cream and got hit by a bus

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why did so many people die in the typhoon in the Philippines because they had to finish there math homework

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Why did the boy fall off the bike? Because he was a paraplegic.

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What do you get when you cross Michael Jackson? A collision, if Michael Jackson were alive.

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Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary.

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Why was Jenny alone? Everyone else had died in a zombie apocalypse.

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where do you find a dog with no legs? Korea. It's customary for the guests to get the drumsticks.

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How come Dorothy couldn't feel her legs? The metal cable snapped.

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What happens when Lord Voldemort tries to kill Harry Potter? He is unsuccessful.

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I will slap myself once for every like this joke gets!

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How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

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Why did the black man drop his weed Because he got shot

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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My grandfather died in a Nazi Death Camp. He fell off a watch tower.

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Three midgets walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer, the second one orders whiskey, and the third one ordered water because all three of them had agreed that he would be the designated driver that night.

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Why'd the littler girl fall of the swing? because a drunk driver ran through the swing, the little girl was killed. he was later charged with manslaughter.

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What did the hand say to the face? Nothing because body parts cannot speak.

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Have you heard the one about the blonde and the bear? No. Me neither.

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens have no sense of direction, he might have thought he was in wal-mart for all I care.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops