So an African, Asian, and White man walk into a bar, what do they all have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantaloupe.

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Why did the baby duck cry? Because his family just got ran over by a truck

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whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

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A dyslexic atheist stays up at night wondering if there is a Dog

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Whats the best day of the week? Sponge

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What did Goldilocks ask the Three Bears? Nothing, bears are aggressive mammals and killed her before she could speak.

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A Jew, a black man and a Christian enter a bar. Black people werent allowed in at the time so he was escorted out. The Jew And Christian have a blast and the time of their lives that night.

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Why wasn't the little boy allowed to get a dog? Because the orphanage he lives at doesn't allow dogs.

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WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

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Why did the black guy stop his car? There was a stop sign

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How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

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Why did the Fly die? Cause it died the average life span is 30 days.

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what did the handicap, gimp kid get on his test? I cant tell you.

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

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yo moma so stupid she went to the dentist for a bluetooth.

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So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

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How do you help a chronic drug addict? Buy him or her more drugs. They NEED it.

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Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

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Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

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Why was little Mat petting his dog? Just kidding his dog died in a house fire... so did little Mat

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How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

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A man walks in to a bar, wakes up the next morning with the news that they have found a cancerous tumor in his neck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops