A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

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How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

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Friend: Dude are you going to see the hunger games? Me: But i alreay seen it Friend: Dafuq? its not even out yet. Me: African children invented the hunger games. Friend: -.-

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There was once a really smart Hufflepuff.

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What looks good hanging from trees? Spanish moss.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your car repossessed.

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Why aren't there any black flesh-colored bandages? Good question.

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Why did the black man grab and tie up the white woman? Because the white woman was a serial killer who has been on the FBI's most wanted list for killing children.

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Q: why was the baker a coward? A: his own mother told him his potential would amount to nothing more than a baker and when a dinosaur came into the bakery he ran away

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What is the hottest day of the week? Wednesday

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Why was Hellen Keller blind and deaf? Because she was a girl.

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A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

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do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

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Why did Bob scream "Nurrrrrrrrr!!"?.....because he was mentally challenged.

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Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

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What begins with "B" and ends with "N" that you never want to call your neighbor? a Black Person

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If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Please don't shoot me

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know what? SCREW YOU!

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What's red and smells like blue paint? red paint

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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What do you call a guy with no arms and legs buried 6 feet under the ground? Doug What do you call a guy with no arms and legs buried 3 feet under the ground? Douglas

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What do you can a stinky mexican? Whatevet his name may be. Possibly Jose

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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