Knock Knock. Hello Frank! How'd you know it was me? There is a window next to the door.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q. want to hear the biggest lie in the world ? A. sure A.I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than a dead baby joke? A dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

This episode featuring an all new nonspeaking character, who never goes on screen.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is black and white and has 4 wheels? A zebra, I lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did one pig say to the other pig while sitting in the bathtub? No thanks I already have a typewriter.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the dog say to the rabbit? I quite liked Prince's first album.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An extremely talented reptile.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the grape say to the bannana? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Bugs dance, so do ants, Oh my glob it’s Adventure Time!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the koala.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A blonde drank an entire fruit smoothie in one sitting. She got a brain freeze.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? To mutilate the body of a dead Jewish girl that lay on the other side. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man was arguing with his wife over the phone at a trainstation. She threatened to leave him he did not stop his physical abuse. The man became so mad he hung up the phone. He then noticed a blind man was grinning at the overheard discussion. The husband walked over and pushed the blind man on the tracks. He died

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is annoying and uses another language? Spanish class!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Chickens are not smart enough to open a gate and avoid traffic at the same time!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q; What is green and eats rocks? A; The green rock eater... Q;What happens when you through a rock straight up in the north pole? A; The green rock eater eats it..

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock Who's there? Nick Oh hi Nick come in

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Doctor Doctor, I keep getting horrible boils all over my face! Okay then. Take off your underwear and we'll see what's going on.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Study from real life: My trip to Texas. (From the time when I was interested in mormon-ism.) Texan: And here is my gun collection, great for shootin yer Mexican scum. Me: Uh I am Norwegian but my ancestors where Russian or something so my skin is... Texan: *points gun at me and pushes trigger halfways* Just kidding der son, sure you aint no Mexican though? Okay just checkin ya know... Me *sweating bullets* Texan guys gun go off almost hitting me and breaking a vase.. Conclusion: He blamed me, everyone had lunch outside later, everyone kept looking at the "trigger happy MEXICAN"... Nero: By then I began grasping the fact that I was better suited for the study of the dark arts... And also learned that in Mormonism, Heaven and Hell are planets locked into war, where black people where neutral, and red people are demon supporters, but WE CAN ALL BE SAVED BY BECOMING WHITE! JUST LIKE THE ANGEL MORONI! Conclusion two: Moroni... Lol.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why did the family get sick?? because i fucked a girl with a parsnip then sold the parsnip to a family with 4 small children

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Salt is brown, Pepper is white, my kitchen is in a mess.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops