Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius.

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What's 2+2? Gonorrhea

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Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and broke its head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be very mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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How can you tell the difference between a cow? One says moo

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house?. No, Well neither has he...

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What's the difference between a ginger and a brick? Bricks get laid

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a man was shot.... he died

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So an African, Asian, and White man walk into a bar, what do they all have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantaloupe.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he can make before the car hits him.

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Why did the man with no arms fall of his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him

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Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

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What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows, he was a chicken, and was not capable of human speech, so he never told anyone.

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What do you call a black man being raped by 6 members of the Ku Klux Klan? Rape

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What did the hedgehog say to the beaver? Nothing, they can't talk.

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Why did the Nazi Doctor drown a Jew in the lake? To see how long it would take a Jew to drown with its big nose. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

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When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

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Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

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what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

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How many Druggies does it take to make toast. One.

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CNN has posted that the recent death of osama bin laden is comparable to decapitating a snake when really it is more akin to bisection of a worm.

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Whats red, black and brown? My anus after a Friday night

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If I had a penny for every time I said the word "the" I would have AIDS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops