David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

what did the older brother do? put on a joke on anti jokes what did the younger brother do ? give it a minus score what did the older brother do ? tell him and then played gears of war 2 (they got gears 3 but wanted to go bakc in time, not like michael J fox in a car with a crazy doctor but as in play an old game)

So this chick meets a guy at a bar. They never greet each other and the drive home sober.

A horse walks in a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?"..... The horse incapable of understanding the humane language promptly poos on the floor and leaves.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Orange. Don't be ridiculous. Oranges can't talk.

What's black and white and red all over? Nothing.

How did the idiot die? He comitted suicide because people were picking on his stupidity. (If you laughed at this you are a horrible person)

Dr.Octagonapus.... BLAAAAAArGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jackalope :)

What did hitler say to the jacket potato? Your fucked now!

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your Grandmother died.

Why does Garrett have a small penis? He is not old enough to buy extenze.

What's the difference between Jews and pizza? God likes pizza

Knock Knock! Who's there? My arm! My arm who? My arm is everywhere!

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Q: What do you say to a person in a wheelchair who fall downs the stairs? A: Nothing because most likely they would take an elevator.

Why am i so sexy? Because a dog raised me.

Obama ran for re-election in 2012. He lost because he is a horrible president. the liberal left blame his defeat on racists and propose harsh Hate-Crime punishments. America falls into disrepair.

50 gay man and a homophobe are in a nightclub in Florida ...you know how the rest goes.

whats worse than 4 dead monkeys? everything! dead monkeys are awesome

a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

What's big and messy? A big mess

the awkward moment when you kill everyone in school and blame it on the fat kid

Son come here OK daddy Daddy what are you doing DADDY NO! DADDY NO!

How do you beat a black in sports. "shot him when the game starts"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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