The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

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Roses are red violets are blue monkeys like you belong in the zoo but don't be afraid I'll be there to that in the cage but laughing at you

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What's stupid a light bulb.

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What does Chuck Norris order at McDonalds? A Big Mac with a large fry and drink.

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How do you make a blonde fall off of a cliff? You push her off of the cliff.

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Q: Why did Jimmy not have balls? A: A terrible, terrible sand paper accident.

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knock knock who's there funny funny who a funny joke

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What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan? One baby in 10 trashcans.

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat low calorie foods because she wants to lose weight.

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What do you get when you cross a penis with a dinosaur? A dicklodocus.

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So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

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I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

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what did batman say to robin to get him into the car? Get in the car

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My uncle got hit by a truck, what was the last thing to go through his mind? The drive shaft.

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What do black people do with M&Ms? They eat them.

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Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

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I went to the local RSPCA office today....it's tiny, you couldnt swing a cat in it.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind, not to mention deaf and mute.

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Wanna hear a hot headed retard? call and listen carefully 6196342668

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whats shaped like a tree. A tree.

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what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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