A man goes to the doctor and complains: "Doctor, my Viagra hasn't worn off! It's been over eight hours!" The doctor replies "You were bitten by a banana spider. You have one day to live.

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Whats round and bouncy? A bouncy ball

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So a dog walks into a bar.. well thats not true as most bars do not allow dogs.. oh..sorry.

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Eric is gay Ha

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I was walking down a railway line the other day... I was fined £1000

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Who's mean and white and really not nice? Hitler

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Two guys were Arguing. (A & B) A. You suck B. If i suck then you choke. A. The only way id choke is if i smelled your stank ass breathe. B. The only way id have stank ass breathe is if i was liking your moms vagina A. The only way my mom's pussy would stank is if you were liking it. B. The only way id be liking your moms pussy is if it were a dick.... Both stare at each other... and walk off awkwardly

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Why did the chicken cross the road??? Suicide.

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How do you drown a blonde? Weigh her down and throw her into a body of water.

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a guy walks into a bar. he suffered a severe concussion. BECAUSE THE BAR A POLE

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How do you confuse a blonde? The same way you confuse a brunette or redhead, hair color has nothing to do with an individual's intelligence.

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Q: How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? A: 2, one to hold the light bulb and the other to turn the ladder

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A gay man goes out with a butch lesbian and develops a loving relationship, years later they get married and have kids, adopting them from the local orphanage and lives happily ever after.

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Why did Susie fall off the monkey bars? She had no arms.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7 because 7 is a escaped mental patient that thinks 6 betrayed him

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Why did the cupcake walk into the bar? It can't it's a cupcake

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How many Stephen Hawkings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He can't.

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Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses the best ingredients.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil armstrong Neil armstrong walks on the moon...Michael Jackson molests little boys

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The Below statement is an antijoke. The Above statement is a joke.

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How do you kill a clown? You smash his face into a brick.

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Q: What did the Jew get for Christmas? A: Nothing you dumbass, Jews don't celebrate Christmas.

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What's good about eating every night? Knowing that an African won't.

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There's a 4 door kayak going down the street and it loses a wing. How many doughnuts fit in a dog house? And remember its not yellow, because snakes don't have armpits.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops