What more orange that a lime? Most things.

what has a hard shaft and an even harder head? A hammer

what did one tree say to the other spruce up actually nothing because trees can't talk

Ask me if I'm a human. Are you a human? Yes.

Billy Idol walks into a New York City Bar. He snorts lines of coke with his comrades in the bathroom and continues his night by having sex with attractive underage females

What did the boy's mother say to her daughter when she walked in on her father having sex with her grandmother? The grandfather said "how are you"? He wasn't a part of that fiasco. However I'm sure that whoever saw what was confused and looking for answers.

What do you call an blank test? an F

what do call a car full of people on the side of the road? a cool explosion waiting to happen

Mom, how do you make babies? When a daddy and mommy love each other very much... They play with trains and tunnels!(Yay!)

Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

Why couldn't the old man see the Moon? Because he was blind and it was daytime.

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What do you call a man with a horse? A man

my brother yells at me for singing in the shower so i scream "how can you hate from outside the tub when you cant even get in?"

Why does austin bell like it up the butt? Cause he's a cat a kitty cat meow meow meow and meow meow meow

Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

There's a priest, doctor, and blonde on a plane. At the end of the flight they all go their separate ways.

what do you get if you cross a scotsman , who knows nothing about football and a indian? Blackburn rovers, and a good night out

what did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware river? Get in the boat.

What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

What's red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple? The Color Wheel.

Roses are flowers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...