Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken and a dinosaur? You can't. Dinosaurs are extinct.

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A: What do you call a deer with no eyes? A: I got NoEyeDeer!!!

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Who doesn't love finding money in your pocket when you go to put your pants on? a rape victim

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ROTFL = Reaching out to fellow lossers

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took my chevy to the levy but the levy was dry

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Are you still trying to turn me on or something? Well its not not working. Anyway, what is yogurt? So I am eating dead bacteria here? Ifs so strange I feel like I have known you my entire life.

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Yep, super duper stressed, all of the time, but how did you know?

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Women outside of the kitchen.

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Suicide is never funny Unless it's a clown

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Q. Why did the child's mother tell him to clean his room? A. Because his room was messy.

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Whats worse than not having fun at a party? Getting so drunk at a party that you shat in your pants Whats worse than shatting in your pants at a party drunk? Shatting in you pants twice because you were so drunk again.

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What did the black man do for his science project Which is better homemade or colonel sanders?

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what is the differnce between my truck and chuck norris? i eat my own poop.

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civil rights

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I used to have a shirt just like yours, except it was green. And it was a bicycle.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was a recovering alcoholic who recently relapsed and drove his car through his garage. He took his anger out on his wife and kids. His wife kicked him out and filed for divorce. Conveniently, the liquor store is across the street.

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What's worse than getting an erection in church Getting an erection while naked in church

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Hey you must be a parking ticket, because your yellow.

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your mom is so fat that she had to start going to a gym to exercise and get her weight under control.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Shit on her face

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What did god say when a black person was born? Damn I burnt one

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops