A man walks into a bar, asks for a drink. He then realises that it was a metal bar and not one that serves alcoholic beverages. He then ponders the mysteries of the world and the universe.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had completed its task on the aforementioned other side and was returning back to the coop for a feeding now that the sun had set.

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A guy walks into a psychiatrist's office covered only in Saran Wrap. He asks the doctor, "The strip of metal teeth is missing from the box, so could I borrow your scissors?"

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Guess what? That is actually a ridiculously broad question, and I can be referring to anything. You really have no chance in guessing "what" is. As a matter of fact, I can just be thinking about a thought of something else, which is not even a concrete thing. Therefore, you really have no chance of guessing what "what" actually is. So I win. You lose.

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#Divorced, beheaded and died! #Divorced, beheaded, survived! # He's Henry VIII, he had six sorry wives #Some might say he ruined their lives!!!!!!! #Catherine of Aragon was one. # She failed to give him a son #He had to ask her for a divorce. #That broke her poor heart of course. #Young Anne Boleyn, she was two #Had a daughter, the best she could do #He said she flirted with some other man #And off with the chop, went dear Anne! #Lovely Jane Seymour was three! #The love of his lifetime indeed! #She gave him a son #Little Price Ed #Then poor old Jane...went and dropped dead! #Divorced, beheaded and died! #Divorced, beheaded, survived! #He's Henry VIII, he had six sorry wives #Some might say he ruined their lives!!!!!!! #Anne of Cleeves came at four #He fell for the portrait he saw! #But laid eyes on her face, and cried #SHE'S A HORSE! I MUST HAVE ANOTHER DIVORCE! #Catherine Howard was five #A child of nineteen, so alive #She flirted with others, no way to behave #The AXE sent young Cath to her grave! #Catherine Parr, she was last #By then all his best days were past #He lay on his death bed, aged just fifty-five! #Lucky Catherine- the last stayed alive! #I mean, how unfair! #Divorced, beheaded and died! #Divorced, beheaded, survived! # He's Henry VIII, he had six sorry wives #You could say he ruined their lives!!!!!!! And the moral of the story is: Never buy a car without knowing it's background.

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whats worse than 2 jews 3 jews

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What do you call a man in a wall? Stuck.

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how do you rube out a circle? don't draw one

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Your mother is so stupid that she had to study, a lot.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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How do you kill a baby? You take a gun and shoot it.

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Q: which is easier to unload a truck of dead babies or a truck of alove babies? A: dead babies cause u can use a pitchfork

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Why did the weiner dog that punctured Doris' bladder get carried away during an oral sex session? Because the dog had a terribly troubled childhood which led to a faliure to adequately function in adulthood

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How do you get Pikachu on a Bus? Pikachu Is A Fictional Charecter.

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Everyone is equal. It doesn't matter if you're black, red, yellow, brown, or normal.

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a

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what has a hard shaft and an even harder head? A hammer

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Why couldn't the dwarf mother reach for the top shelf? Her height was at a mini-mum.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? You don't, he just jumps down.

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chuck norris won the world series of poker using his superior knowledge of counting cards and calculating probability.

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Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny? yeah niether do I

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WTF? If you look at life from the right, you might just see whats left, and just then I looked down at the midget as he said "Yo whats up?" I told him, hey do you like left? He said! DAAAAAMN RIIIIIGHT! I spent a while just standing there wondering what the hell was happening into my life, it was so right it was left and wrong... NeroMetal (No fucking idea what Neronism is, I just play streetfighter V and type books that confuse people)

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Q: yugdyijgdripgdghd A: sorry I'm retarted. I don't know wtf I'm doin

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Eric is gay Ha

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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