If omar has 7 apples and his bus is 7 minutes early, what is the mass of the sun? Pi. Partially because the piece of paper couldnt dance with your mother.

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What would Walt Disney do if he were alive today? Gurgle and choke inside his cryogenic vault as liquid nitrogen flooded into his lungs.

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Curiosity killed the cat, Oh wait, I thought the dog did.

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Is that your face or is your dog walking backwards.

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How did freedom die in Europe? It was shot in the chest with a rifle.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? Using teamwork and coordination, each can place one foot on the seat of the stool, and using each other for balance and support, they can all stand on the stool. The fact that they are gay is irrelevant.

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You had ONE job. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough to support your dying wife and ill child.

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There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

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How do you stop a baby from spinning round a washing line. Hit it in face with a baseball bat.

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Q: Why did'n the dirty man jump into the shower? A: Because he spotted the potential danger to jump into a slippery shower and proceeded with caution.

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What is cowboy say

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Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

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A man lying in bed at night rolls over and starts rubbing his wife's back. She says, "Not tonight, honey, I have a headache." Her husband respected her wishes and went to sleep.

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Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

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If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

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What's worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust.

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have 5 Fingers The Middle One's For You!! :D

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There is my brain said the English man stop leaving it in the fridge and let me mug you now get in the car OK!

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Wish me luck these are the ten numbers on my keno 19 65 80 2 34 72 68 22 12 8

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Whats funny? Your face.

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what did the judge say to the lawyer during a trial. He said We are all in a court. thus concluding that the judge was retarted.

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if you have a name/nickname/brand/version or number, please like this anti joke

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Why doesn't Andy wanna bend over to puck something up? That's how he got assraped!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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