Whats the same between a baby and pizza? their both edible

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I love bacon therefor I love people who eat bacon execpt people who eat my bacon then I hate people who eat bacon

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what did the monitor say to the boy? Im a Monitor

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

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A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

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I always used bra`s so I guess you know, nice I guess. Can you please stop it? I like know I am telling but my mind wont like accept it, and I would just like to shut off the laptop, but I want to keep chatting with you for just a bit more.

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Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a convicted rapist.

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Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing? A. She had no arms Q. Why didn't she get back up? A. She had no legs Q. Why did no one help her up? A. She had no friends Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing A. She had no arms You: knock knock Other person: who's there? You: not Lucy

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Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender? A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car 2 hours later your brother finds you and told you that him and your wife have been cheating on you and your kid is his.

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What's worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

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The people who posted those extremely long "jokes" down there have no life.

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Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

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what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

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What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

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Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

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Why was Chris crying? There was a robbery at his house and both of his parents were brutally murdered.

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School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

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what did hitler say when the allies invaded germany i did NAZI that coming

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There's a black and a mexican guy in a car. Who's driving? The chauffeur.

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A black and a white walk into a bar, d.r. King would be proud.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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