Why was the road crossed by the chicken? Because as an animal, incapable of understanding human languages and consequently lacking in education, it was unable to understand the convention of not using the passive voice in English prose writing.

What happened when the Arabic man went through airport security? He was racially profiled and stopped, delaying not only him but the line of people behind him.

What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

What did the man say to the butterfly? To the butterfly? Nothing. He was probably talking to himself.

Why was 2 afraid of three Because it bigger

"Have you heard the one about the trannie?" "No, what is it?" "Wow, that's offensive." -Juanita

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

What's Black, white, green, and red? To bloody zebras fighting over a pickle

what did the duck say to the other duck Quack

I took my father out last night. We went to the Olive Garden.

why did the black man drink grape kool-aid kool-aid refreshed him after a hard days work out in the field picking cotton

They don't call it Bangkok for nothing.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Too get to the other side. Duuu no one crosses the road to get killed.

What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

Knock knock. Who's there? Jack. Honey, Jacks here, will you get the door?

One day Jesus said to John, " come forth and recieve everlasting life." Sadly John came in fifth and won a toaster.

Hah, I bet a faggot that lost his balls in the war is "above" such things as seduction and all things straight! 25 million US dollars, send them to me within a week, or I will hunt you down by tracking down every single one of your fucking followers (all six of them), and make you wish you where dead. And tell me where you live, send me your sister so I can rape her, send me your boyfriend so I can cut him to pieces, send my your children so I can make sure your genes stop, send my your mothers tits so I can hang them on my wall, and kill your father and post the shit on youtube! Maybe then we are halfway close a settlement.

What does A.D.D stand for? Attention deficit disorder

A man walks into a restaurant and asks a waiter, "Do you serve crabs here?" The waiter says, "Certainly! In fact, stuffed crab is today's special."

What do u call a joke with no punchline? An anti-joke

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." The man of the house subsequently notifies his government that genetic engineering is going awry.

When life gives you AIDS! Make lemonAIDS!

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because they taste funny.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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