A man walks into a bar, drinks, then leaves the bar.

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What happened to the twins? 9/11

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Where it had just witnessed a horrific car accident involving it's spouse, who died on impact. Eventually the chicken fell into a deep depression, taking it out on his children in the form of physical abuse. Over time, the chicken ended up being alone, having no contact with his kids, having no friends, and living in a massive house with no one else. One day, he had a stroke, and no one called an ambulance because no one knew.

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A priest and a small child enter a bar. The bartender takes his son back from the priest, paying him $30 for his exemplary babysitting services.

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I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

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Why couldn't little Billy fall asleep. Because Billy didn't have any counting skills to be able to coins sheep

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What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

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You see the love of your life. You can't say anything. She walks toward you. You can't move. She sits on you. You can't do anything. She starts crapping on you. You realize your a toilet. -Adam Chebali

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Why did the man die? because he hit his head and drowned

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didnt. Why do we have to live in a world where people have to be so concered about why a stupid chicken decides to cross a road. Shouldnt we all be more focused on ways to get a better economy, or maybe end world hunger?

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Knock Knock! But nobody was home and couldn't hear it.

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What did the asshole say to his friend behind him? Fart

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He had no arms

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Why did andy fall down Because his friend pushed him over

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What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? - Nothing This homeless man got a gift for his Birthday. What happened to the gift? - It got stolen the following day What did this homeless man get for New Year? - Still nothing Get real.

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. . I am a whale

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Roses are blue Violets are unicorns This doesn't make sense Refrigerator

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not intelligent enough to realize the hazardous dangers of crossing the street.

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What do you call Batman and Robin after they have been run over by a car? Dead.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing. I don't know. Why? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Your Mom The End.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

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what did one paper football say to the other? did you get flicked off too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops