How do you get a one-armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

What was the strangest part about meeting a girl called Suzie? She had arms.

Why do mexicans like burritos? Because they taste good.

So a man and his wife were in a horrible car accident. The man died, so why isn't the wife mourning his death? Because she is also dead. But, do you know who did mourn and cry over this horrible tragedy? Their children, other family members, and friends.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

I love bacon therefor I love people who eat bacon execpt people who eat my bacon then I hate people who eat bacon

How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

How do you kill a blonde? Tell her she can breath underwater.

How do you put in a lightbulb? Call your local electrition

Just want to know where I will be dipping my... MANFLESH!

What's better then finding an apple in the Holocaust? Finding a tunnel under the fence.

Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

Why did the girl make a sandwich for her boyfriend? Because she offered to make lunch in order to save money by not going to a restaurant.

A: Knock Knock (pause) B: Please use the doorbell, it is very late and I like to be considerate of my neighbors

Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

whats the difference between a black and a bunk bed? a bunk bed can support 2 kids.

Q: What did the Jewish man say to the Muslim man? A: Hello, how are you today? Nice weather we're having, isn't it?

A drunk guy walks into a car

How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

A man walks into a bar, he sits down.

Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

What's greenish blue, smelly, and mushy? The fungus under my sink.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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