A drunk guy walks into a car

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An obese man walked into McDonalds and ordered 6 Big Macs. He proceeded to walk to a booth in the back corner and eat them all. Turns out he was white.

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What did the white man say to the black man? Did you see the game yesterday?

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whats the difference between a black and a bunk bed? a bunk bed can support 2 kids.

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When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

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Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

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How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

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Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? "Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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How does a black man get down the stairs? He walks.

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Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

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What do you call a person with cancer A hospital patient, what did you expect? Oh. Of course you expected Chewbacca.

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Q. How many blonds do you know? A. I don't know any blonds, but are you perhaps talking about blondes? Because if so, I still don't know any.

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In Soviet Russia, you drive the car, fill it up with gas, and park it. Just like in America.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman

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How do you get to pigs in a pen? Move them.

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So this squirrel is walking across the road when a HUGE truck comes and smashes him beneath the tire.

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3 blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The 1 blonde says they're deer tracks. The 2 blonde says they're elk tracks. The 3 blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink successfully, pays, and leaves. Three weeks later he dies tragically.

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"Roses are red, violets are blue," she explained to the color blind child, who was unable to understand the concept of color.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Light turned green, indicating that it was a safe and appropriate time to cross

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My girlfriend wanted to talk about her feelings ... SO I TOLD THAT BITCH THAT... i really loved her and care about her feelings

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If pro is the opposite of con what's the opposite of progress? Retrogression.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops