Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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69

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hey guys im gay

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How do you shock a child? Attach a metal pole to them while there is a storm

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What did the homeless kid get for Christmas? Hypothermia.

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List of people I love: Hitler Stalin Mussolini Ted Bundy Charles Manson Hannibal Lecter Vladamir Putin Satan Justin Beiber One Direction Chris Brown Chris Brown's parents Oh, and my mother. I love my mother, too.

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Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

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What's brown and smells like shit? Brown colour. I'm synesthetic.

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A man climbs a tree, falls, and breaks his legs. He will never walk again

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Knock Knock Who's there? Max. Max who? Max who starts his greeting with,  "In accordance with Megan's law"  

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A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

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Why did the Jew lock the chest? Because that's where he was hiding the body.

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Why can't Roger drive a tractor? Because Roger is a goldfish

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What did Billy Mays eat for breakfast? nothing, he's dead.

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lets work together to make all racists jokes in negitives

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Where did grandpa go for his birthday The morgue.

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knock knock , who is there the postman the postman who ? the postman who is gonna give you a bill !

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what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

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The Dalai Lama orders a slice of pizza for $2 and gives the cashier a $5 bill. He then realizes he hasn't been given any change, so he asks for his change. The cashier quickly apologizes and hands the Dalai Lama three dollar bills.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned.

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Your mamas so old. When she farted dust came out.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf.

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What happened to the girl who got an infection from an abortion? She died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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