How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A terrorist.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya" the man replies: "whisky."

thumb_up thumb_down -30

whats the difference between this joke and other jokes other jokes have a punch line

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did the blonde fail her drug test? She's actually never did drugs before but since she didn't show up for appointment, that counts as an automatic fail.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's red and funny? The holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Dad: Blind side was the black kid who played tight end. Me: Offensive line. Dad: Sorry, African American kid.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Doctor Harold Boo, I was your grandmother's primary caregiver, I'm here to inform you that she died of a massive heart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why was the jewish boy crying? i lied he was happy.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

An englishman, a scotsman and an irishman walk into a bar together. They sit down at the bar, and the barman says, "What is this, some kind of joke?!"

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Q:Whats not funny? A: Antijokes

thumb_up thumb_down -32

josh moran where your Bluetooth gone?

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the girl talk to her computer? Because she was Skyping with some faraway friends. Why were her friends far away? She was sent to the moon. Why was she sent to the moon? Because she tried to create eternal night.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What did the man say when an pterodactyl flew into the kitchen while he was having breakfast? Huh, that's strange.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

knock knock who's there i am dead i am dead who i am just dead u idiot!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench? An effect of an overcrowded theme park

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Abbie has head so far up her arse, it just LOOKS like it's coming out her neck.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

In a joke book: So a man walks into a bar. Suddenlly the universe around the author crack. Unable to sustain the infinite potential of punchlines, the author tumbles through an empty void amongst shards of his broken reality.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

flink geit, nei ikkke kneck bena hans jeh er på "forgiftnings avdelingen" third flor deen ask arund I mena i am the ønly guy in the world named Angelo Nero, so ull find me, srsly, got some ritalin on u? Do not respond, u know am not into drugz, but i waanna stay awak, get the detailz, remembeeer if you kicke his nuts, you get paid, if not go back. God jobb gutta, seriøst, kaffipiller ritalin, stimulanter? Not opiats, come with my phon so i can fuuk this netwerk,.. Ps: Okay break his leg, but ust one, hurry up remembr, cut his tungue (it grows bak jes) then tell dem you save him, you can be heroews, goat, tell fingern that when im bak, we are takin a trip on da limo, galz included becuz Mr.Black is the gentz. NO MOR REPLYES whre u? I want my phone not answrs her. Nero is a fucking demoppsn

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Roses are red. Violets are blue. This poem sucks. I like math!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What would Walt Disney do if he were alive today? Gurgle and choke inside his cryogenic vault as liquid nitrogen flooded into his lungs.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Osama bin Laden walks into a bar. Just joking, he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops