What's worse then a missed call from your dad? A missed call from your mom.

Q: Why did the Asian boy pass the math test? A: By studying with dedication to the field.

how many people does it take to change a light bulb....... none..................its stilll bright

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Relizing its a used tampon covered with blood.

Why did the black women sing to the left to the left? Answer: because black people have no rights

Why did Hitler try to take over the world? Hitler wanted to spread the Nazi (National Socialism) idea, He also wanted to destroy the Jews(Christian and non-Christian) and many other groups of people using the prevailing scientific idea of the day eugenics and survival of the fittest

Yo moma so fat, it ain't even funny. Seriously. She is suffering real diabetes! Do you know how that feels? I though so...

Why did the Asian woman get into a car accident? She didn't pay attention in driver school and sped through a red light and hit a bus that killed 14 children.

Why did the man break all his bones? Because his parachute failed to open

A girl hands her boyfriend her phone and says it's his dad. He throws it on the ground exclaiming, "My dad's not a phone, duh!"

Why did the chicken cross the road? It tried. The chicken was run over by a distracted driver. The chicken turned out to be Farmer Brendan's prized egg hen who wandered away. The hen provided a large portion of Brendan's income and living. The farmer, deprived of his vital income source, was forced to sell his farm and live on the city streets.

What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? The pizza does not scream in the oven

I have magical powers. Try your best to not to follow these instructions: Ready? Go. You are now blinking your eyes. (strike 1) You are now breathing voluntary. (strike 2) You suddenly have an itch somewhere on your body. (strike 3) You lost. Thanks for playing my little game. Hope you enjoy thinking of a flying pink elephant with wings.

Did You Hear about the Black Guy That went to College?....Neither Did I...

To Daniel You must have been born on a highway cuz thats where most accidents happen

Why did the boy run down the road? Because he was being chased by a tsunami

A horse walks into a convenience store. He grabs a pack of gum, pays the man at the counter, and walks out.

What did the mother do when she found out the baby was stillborn? Gave it a proper burial, grieved for months and became a shell of her former self.

Roses are red,Here's something new ,violets are violets,not ******* blue

How do you make asian ice cream you mix it with a textbook

If 1+1=2 why does 2+2 not equal 3?

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? A teenage girl was texting and driving, didn't see it, and now it's roadkill.

What do old people break when they fight? A sweat

What did one dolphin say to the other after watching a banana dance with an afro. My pancreas was replaced with a mango.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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