Q)A man and a women are hiking on a mountain trail. A bear appears. What do they do? A) Die.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because that's where the oncologist's office is.

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TOFFEES HEAD LYING IN THE GRASS

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How do you know when you are really ugly? Objective self-evaluation, and frank, honest discussion with close friends and family.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah Witness

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Q: What did the newborn dumpster baby say to the raccoon? A: Nothing. Newborn babies cannot talk.

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Someone dies every second. That's 60 a minute. 3600 a hour. 86,400 a day. 604,800 a week. 31,536,000 a year. But thankfully- I don't live in Zimbabwe.

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

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An Asian woman is driving home from work and arrives in 30 minutes, which is strange because it normally does not take that long but she left during rush hour and the traffic was very bad at the time.

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What did the chicken say to the duck .... Nothing the chickin was Spanish and the duck was illiterate

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Ron Sparks.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Q: Why didn't johnny get any Christmas presents? A: Because he died in a house fire 3 years ago.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. Then the man pays for the beer and drinks the beer.

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Knock knock Who's there? Your mom Oh hi mom

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Why was the baby crying? He saw a nigga

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how many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? 2 one to hold the latter and one to put it in

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What looks like a smiley face no serously what I want to know

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Q: You know what's really funny? A: A good joke.

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Why did the duck cross the road? Because there was a gunman on the same side of the path and it would most likely be safer to avoid making eye contact

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When life throws you melons, You probably won't catch them.

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Q:How do you sleep with Paris Hilton? A:You don't. she got herpes.

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what has two lags and red all over? :a cat in a chinies restrunt...

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CAOIMHIN. IVE BEEN DOING MY WORK SINCE IVE STARTED THIS CLASS. YOU'VE STARTED THIS WHOLE THING. I WROTE BIG MAC'S AND THATS IT. SO STFU

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops