Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

how much fish could a chicken

What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

What happened to the dog that ate to much? It became obese.

What did the fruit say when it was about to be sliced in half? Nothing, fruits cannot talk, duh.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Daisies are red, OH SHIT! MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!!!

An Indian, American and French man walk into the bar simultaneously. Unfortunately, they get stuck in the door.

What do you do to Jewish people? You Challah at them.

What did the Blonde do when she saw train tracks? She walked over slowly, looked both ways, and crossed safely

What's a bench painted red white and blue all over? An American BENCH.

Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

Contrary to the popular saying, "An apple a day keeps the doctor away," if you get cancer there's nothing an apple can do...

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death

How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

Yo Momma is SO FAT, THAT she has an increased risk of cardiac arrest due to her blood pressure.

a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

Knock knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Mike Davis from across the street. Come in.

A blind man walks past a fish market then says "why hello lady's" ????

What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit.

How do you make a baby stop crying? Drown it in vinegar.

a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

Why did the robot cross the road? Because It was bionically fused to the chicken.

Last Christmas I gave you my heart But the very next day Your body rejected it and you went into cardiac arrest, we both died

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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