Grease is the word that you heard it's got groove it's got meaning

How many jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. It really isn't that hard.

i have no friends actually now i fell bad ... anybody spare money for the bus ahhhhhhh kill me now

Obama Getting Re-Elected.

Policeman: Knock, knock. Woman: Who's there? Policeman: The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your husband has been killed.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a wanted serial killer on the run from the police

Why do girls swim naked in lakes and oceans? so they have an excuse why their pussies smell like either tuna or cat fish.

Why did the boy eat the hedgehog? Because it made his mouth bleed,

What did the girl say to the boy? You are a boy.

Why did Kallum come to Getaway? Because he ran out of hats

When Chuck Norris moved into a new house he decide to renovate because he didn't like the staircase.

Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

What did the Brontosaurus say to the Triceratops? Nothing. Neither of them have ever existed.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

why did the little girl throw a clock out of the window? because she wanted to see time fly

What do you call the branch of Science that separates the organism's race? RACISM

Whats the difference between harry potter and the Jews? Harry potter could escape the chambers.

what is the difference between gravel and dead baby guts? i dont eat gravel.

So I want to write an Anti-Joke, so I go to the write your own tab and see in the security code box: Which one is a country- fried rice or fried chicken. C'mon, it's definitely fried rice.

What do you get when you cross a Chinese man with a dog? A happy Chinese man and a pile of dog bones.

Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And so are you But the roses have wiltered The violets are dead The sugar bowl is empty And so is your head

1. Go to the WRITE YOUR OWN! section on this website. 2. Check the box on "I have read and agreed to the Terms of Service." 3. The Submit button should become available for clicking. 4. Now uncheck the box. 5. Thumbs up if the Submit button is still available. -BG_Shank_A

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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