What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

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A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

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I put the STD in stud now all i need is U

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Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

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why did little suzy fall off the swing? she was stabbed by a drugaddict

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What do you call cheese that's mine? My cheese

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Cameron is a r e t a r d

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What's the difference between an American and a British guy? Their fingerprints.

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What is long hard and woody? A tree.

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What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

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*Click* "Hello you have reached a pre-recorded voice at the suicide hotline. We regret to inform you that our consultant has suffered a recent bout of depression due to the sheer volume of calls he has received." "His body was found this morning, hanging from a tree." [L]

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Knock Knock. Who's there? You Know. You Know who?.......GOODBYE!

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A young boy is crying in the park, when priest walks up to him -What's the matter son? -My parents died in a horrible car accident 2 weeks ago and now i'm held in an abusive household.

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Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun And you don't,

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How did the thief acquire a lamborghini? He has a side job as a lamborghini salesman.

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What happens when you throw a red rock into a purple river? It gets wet...

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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How did Whitney huston die? By eating a turkey sasandwich and then put a car jump starter in the bath tub.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a giant scorpion.

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Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear, fuzzy wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy had no hair because he had cancer and died 3 weeks later.

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How many Stephen Hawkings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He can't.

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why did the blond get and abortion? because she was forcefully raped by her 42 year old boy friend and felt she could not raise a child on her own.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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