Hickory dickery dock, two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck 1 and the other got away with minor injuries.

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What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

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why do woman love the twilight books? i have no idea woman can't read

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Why did Zayne have no friends? Because he is retarded.

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Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

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whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

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women and girls can really get enjoyment out of sex. it's not really about controlling the man.

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Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

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a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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who's yellow , and looks like a bear? pudsey

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What is the difference between my dog and my girlfriend? I love my dog

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Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

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Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

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Why didn't the blond cry at her child's funeral? She died, too. It was a terrible accident.

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

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Knock Knock Who's there? My foot. My foot who? My foot in your ass.

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Next Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Sexual assault.

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What is a holocaust victim's favorite food? Nothing.

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Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

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"Why is Barney purple and green?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way"

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A horse walks into the bar. The bartender asks "why the long face" Turns out the horse's family died that evening.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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