How many blondes does it take to change a diaper? About a thousand

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm blind.

Chuck Norris shaves with his fists. That's why he still has a beard.

These Jokes suck.

a person who will soon die of beeties

why did the dog chase the cat? because the cat chased the dog first.

What do you call two blacks on a bike? Two good friends having a good time.

What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

How does Batman's mother call him to dinner? She doesn't, she's dead.

Why did the mailman deliver the wrong mail to people's houses? He's a bad mailman.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs. Why did noone help her up? She was fat.

a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I workout, Don't mess with me.

Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

Why was six afraid of seven? Six had severe paranoia.

I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

What did the alcoholic tell his son? Don't do meth.

How did the man want his hair cut? In silence.

How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

Why is Michael J. Fox so go at dance? Because he took lesson as a child

Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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