A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks why the long face? The horse, unable to comprehend human speech, promptly craps on the floor and leaves.

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? He needed money to feed his family and to pay for his daughter's college education.

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what can keep u alive for many years- -not being shot

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What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Nobody, this is a metaphorical door..

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what's the difference between a pound of liver and vomit? £3.24

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Yo momma was so ugly that everybody died.

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roses are red violets are blue i take pleasure in the simple things in life as i have nothing else left to live for

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because its a horse. It then poops on the floor and leaves

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Your mother is so fat that when she jumps into a pool, she displaces a proportionately larger amount of water than people with normal body mass indexes or BMI

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WHO THE FUCK IS NERO AND THAT BITCH THAT CLAIMS TO BE NOT NERO BUT NOT NEROMETAL OR WHATEVER? THEY BOTH CLAIM TO BE THE FUCKING MORAL MAN? I STARTED MY RISE TO INFAMY FOR LIKE... Fuck, when I was still studying, it was a fucking social project to prove that others opinions DO NOT MATTER SHIT IN THE END! And now these bastards (some cult faggot and Some "Nerometal" which are probably the same queer) CLAIM TO BE THE MORALMAN? I AM THE MORAL MAN! I AM YOUR FRIENDLY RAPIST/SOCIOPATH! YOU FAKE QUEERMASTERS! I CHALLENGE YOU!

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Why did the man cross the road? Because he couldn't get his dick out of the chicken

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Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

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Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

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did you know helen keller had a swingset? neither did she

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Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks " What'll You Have" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck.

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What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

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whats the stage after cancer? you die

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whats worth than finding half a dead worm in your apple getting rapped by your step dad

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Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

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A guy walks into a bar and falls.

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What is hard, long, moist, and flesh colored? A hotdog you dirty, dirty bastard!

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops