What happens when you rub two penises together? Gay sex.

What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

What did the old man say after he fell down? nothing.

Why did Valter fall of the swing? Because he didn't have any arms Knock knock Whos there? Not valter

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not answer because he is a horse, and neither speaks nor understands the english language. He looks around, and is confused by his surrondings. He gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Who won the race between the turtle and the hare? Well, odds are the two creatures wouldn't race given that animals do not speak. However, if they were, the hare would most likely win a land race because of its powerful legs and agility. However, if the turtle happened to be a seaturtle and the race took place underwater, our dear little beloved turtle would win, having the advantage over the rabbit.

What's worse then the bomb that went off in boston? The second one right after.

knock knock whos there boo boo who? stop crying its only me! its not you, my mom has cancer, my dad was killed in a car accident, my pregnant wife has been murdered, and my uncle touches me.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your ball sack ripped off with a grapple hook

Why did Obama give a speech? Because he is the president and people look up to him

Your momma is so ugly that when she stepped on the mirror, it broke.

roses are black violets are black i am blind

If there's somethin' strange in your neighborhood Who ya gonna call 911

Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: seven raped six's mom

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

Why didnt santa leave presents under the tree? Because santa doesnt exist.

I may be ugly, but I'm also dumb.

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

What did the orphan say to his parents? nothing

Why did the chicken not make it across the road? Because he got hit by a transport.

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. Unless she's particularly short, then she may need to get a friend, who may or may not be blonde, to help by holding the ladder.

( . Y . )

What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

Why was Little Billy crying? He had cancer. Why was Little Sally crying? Little Billy's cancer was contagious.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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