How I Met Your Mother, starring Oedipus Rex

thumb_up thumb_down -35

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one. Any more than that and they would just be getting in each others way.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What's black and blue and made of poo? A drowning black guy, holding some blue poop

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why did the accident happen? The breaks on the car stopped working. Why did the breaks stop working? The driver was drunk.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Dude, you're playing call of duty by yourself and in last place...HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE!!??

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why did the little boy cry and run home from the store? Because the store was out of pickles.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Q: Why did the dead baby cross the road??? A: It was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What's worse than getting a F on your History test? The millions of children around your age that cannot even afford to go to school, most likely because they live in a third world country.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

A guy walks into a bar. He must have been blind or something.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

chuck noris- can swim through land god- can walk on watter i- can run on air

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What did the chubby, dirty, hobo get for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -37

A man starts acting weird in a resturant, the waiter says "whats the problem sir?" The man says "I'm choking and I just died."

thumb_up thumb_down -37

haha

thumb_up thumb_down -37

a bunch of guys did cocain for the first time. they later died from a drug over dose.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Man: Knock knock Man 2: who's there Alzheimer's patient: to get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down -39

what do you call a sick eagle illegal

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What would the Swatch be called if it was made by a Croatian company? A Crwatch.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

It was a chilly saturday afternoon coles's brother asked cole to baby sit cole said yes and when his brother left cole proceeded to give it to his niece in the ass. Little did cole know he said his little niece on fire that was the end of his little nieces life.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What has four legs and is always ready to travel? Siamese twin fugitives.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Q: Are their Jews in Hell? A: No, because Hitlers there

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She was too tired and was afraid that if she got behind the wheel it might cause her to fall asleep at the wheel which would result in an accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

what is so funny about billy? nothing he is dead and if you laught at him you are the biggest jerk by: Brennan pickrell

thumb_up thumb_down -43

What do you do when you have a baby and your being shot by a terrorist. You use the baby as a shield.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops