A Blonde, Brunnette, and red head are on the beach. They find a sand gene and are each granted a wish. The Brunnette wishes for a yot. The Red Head wishes to never again get sun burn. The Blonde wishes for more sun. The world is overtaken and insinerated by the sun. An alien spaceship finds the Red head in a space suit floating around randomly when they ask how she survived she says "I don't sun burn"

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dickdickvdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdick

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Whats from Hattersley? Someone who lives in Hattersley.

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A man walks into a bar the bartender looks at the man and says "Hey son you wanna make one hundred bucks?" the man looks at the bartender and says "Im not your son."

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How do you shock thomas eddison? Attatch his kite to his balls.

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Lets just say some of my boys owed me a favor, and that if we where all "clean slate workers" I would never have been able to pull some favors out of the higher ups. As far as for "these Shadows" of yours, I know nothing, while I invented the encoding format for the messages you use, I intend keeping it to myself. People here will still assume this is bullshit unless you get somebody to hack this site, believe me, its pretty damn easy to retrieve whatever data might have been lost.

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whats red bubbly and looks out of a windo? a baby in a mocrowave

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A man walks into a bar. Three hours later, ambulances arrived, because the man was knocked out. The man who saved was known as a hero, and was awarded a medal for his good deed.

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Three muffins are walking next to each other in the dessert. The muffin on the right says "Hey now it's my turn to walk in the middle!"

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there are two muffins in an oven. one says "its getting hot in here". the other says " oh my gosh!!! its a talking muffin!!!"

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, FUCK, MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!

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The Americans have just spent millions of dollars working on a pen that works in space. I would of just used a pencil.

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Q: What did bulbasoar say to charmander? A: Bet ya thought I was gunna say Bulbasoar!!

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what's gray, red, and goes over a 100 mph? a toad in a blender

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There are two muffins in an oven. Since they are inanimate objects, they do nothing but sit there and bake until they are a golden brown color, at which point a man takes them out of the oven and eats them for breakfast.

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What did the blond say to the other blond? "I like your shoes."

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A: Doctor doctor help me! B: Sorry, I'm not actually a doctor, stop calling me that!

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Chuck Norris has normal human strength.

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What do you call a man who's a gynecologist, painter and respected martial arts champion? Talented.

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What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. What? You are about to die and be eaten. Asshole! i will murder you first!

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Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

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Why did Jonathan choose to watch something else other than Geordie Shore? Jonathan is intellectual.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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