What did the terrorist do to the small village? Destroy it with a bomb vest.

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why did the chicken cross the road? there was a black man walking towards him

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What did the chicken say when it finally crossed the road? - nothing, its a chicken

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whats fat and sits on a toilet? a fat guy sitting on the toilet

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so a horse walks into a bar and the bartender syas why the long face and the horse says naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

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How do you have sex with 9 giraffes? you don't because that's weird

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A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

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A man is walking on the beach and notices a shiny brass lamp on the ground. He picks it up, polishes it and then sells it for a reasonable amount of money at a local pawnbroker.

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French man: Bonjour! English man: um, i am not french! french man: oh, My chat is on this beautiful country! Her name is Valentina! English man: What you poo in the open and name them?

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What's worse than finding gum on your shoe? Being molested by a sea urchin.

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Whats the same between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple except for the elephant

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Why did the muffin not eat the other muffin. Because muffins do not have a digestive system.

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roses are blue violets are red dont judge me

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Did the single mother survive the plane crash? No.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a tree There isn't a tree in my garage

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what does the monster eat after going to the dentist? the dentist

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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Why did the fish fly It didn't

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Why did the kid lose his nose? because his brother chopped it off with an axe.

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What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? 'Where's my tractor?'

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse unable to comprehend english shits on the floor and leaves

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Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

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A black man, a Mexican man, a Jew, an Asian man, and a white man get into a fight. Who won? Well since their dispute got all the way to a fight, I guess nobody really wins.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops