Yo mama so fat when she dresses in red she looks like clifford the big red dog!

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What's funny about a small child with no arms, no legs? Nothing.. Nothing at all.

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And you honored it I see :P

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Pandas Everywhere!!!

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Why did the little boy viciously slash the orange object with a carving knife? Because it was Halloween.

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A man walks into a bar, and then a second man walks into a bar. The third man ducked.

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*Walk Into The Bakery* "Excuse me, sir. How much does the challah cost (holocaust)?

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What's under the first mate? The second mate.

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What would George Washington do if he was able to talk to all of America? Ask them to dig him up.

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What has two legs but can't walk A paraplegic

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Knock knock. Who's there? AV. AV who? Asshole vison. Now that's Amusement Vision. (Remembering Amusement Vision...)

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A man walks into a bar. On the way home, he is driving, careers off the road and crashes. Lesson here. Don't walk into poles

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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Whats faster than a mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

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What do you get when you cross an own and a bungee cord? My ass

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What did they gay chicken say to the straight chicken? .... nothing, chickens dont speek.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? One is an adherent to the religion of Judaism, and the other is a doughy bread topped with tomato sauce and cheese. They share virtually no similarities.

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Whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp.

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So a guy walked into the doctors and said, "It hurts when I poke my leg like this." The doctor said, "Well don't poke your leg like that."

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Why did the chicken cross the road To walk back

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A construction worker walks into a bar. Lucky he was wearing his hard hat.

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What is E.T. short For? So he can fit on ship

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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